Episode 40 - Nutrition vs. Dieting: The Truth About Healthy Living, Body Image & Lasting Wellness with Jana Westin

By Jessica Garrison

Our next guest has strong values in her freedom and wellbeing, describing herself as courageous, ambitious, energetic, kind, and dynamic. Jana Westin has joined us previously on our Together We FEEL Panel No More Commenting on Other People’s Bodies, which gives some insight into the amazing work she does.  

Jana’s involved in the world of health, something she struggled with for years. Every single person is different, so there will never be a “one size fits all” solution for health (even if they market it that way). I love that Jana makes the distinction between dieting and nutrition because, though we tend to associate the two, they are completely different. There are some diets out there that are dangerous, and just because you weigh more than someone doesn’t mean they’re healthier than you. Numbers on the scale do not equal how healthy you are, an idea that has been ingrained into our heads from the start. Jana works to help people actually be healthy, rather than helping them reach a goal weight. 

With her own health, Jana looks at her energy levels and how to protect those, which is exactly where boundaries come into play. What do you find acceptable for you? And it doesn’t have to be all in or all out; in fact, it can be more harmful to make too many changes too fast. It’s good to start small so your nervous system isn’t shocked. Jana says that she’s found it fairly easy to set the boundary, but the most difficult part is keeping it. If you continue to say you’ll do something but never do it, you become less trustworthy and your word isn’t worth much. Jana has integrity in what she does, so if she says she’s going to do something, she’ll do it. 

Within her work, Jana wants the client as involved as possible because, as we said in this week’s empowerment episode, you know your body the best. You’re part of your own health team, and that’s where it starts: together. It’s more than just what’s on your plate, and I appreciate Jana prioritizing that message. We villanize food in our society, something we need in order to survive. 

Just because someone is thin doesn’t mean they’ve lost weight in a healthy way or are maintaining it in a way that’s healthy. Don’t judge someone based on their weight or what they’re eating, because you have no idea what they’re going through internally. It’s one thing to be concerned for someone, but it’s another to input your opinion when no one asked for it. 

We all have a comment someone made about the way we look, probably our weight, that has stuck with us in all the wrong ways. You can take a look at Jana’s website or our own to take your first step today towards creating the healthy lifestyle for yourself that you deserve. 

Ways to Engage: Start asking: Check in with your energy levels throughout the days and weeks. Pay attention to the people around you, the foods you’ve been eating, the amount you’ve been sleeping, your workout routines, etc. Keep track of what’s fueling you and what’s draining you to create the healthiest possible environments for yourself.

✨ Free Download: Embracing a FEEL Fueled Life Sample Freebie

✨ Ready for deeper support? Visit our website to schedule a FREE complimentary 30 minute session with Melissa for support on identifying who you are, what nourishes you, and how that shapes building your life around what you value, care about, and aligns with who you are today.

Episode 39 -​​​Communicating Clearly with Medical Practitioners: How to Advocate for Your Health and Be Heard with Melissa Crook

By Jessica Garrison

Do you ever go into the doctor’s office with expectations of how it will turn out, and then it never seems to go that way? Every person I know has had an experience like this, myself included, and it’s because we aren’t Communicating Clearly with our Medical Practitioners—No one knows your body better than you. Melissa has shared her own story about advocating for herself in the medical world, leading her to create The FEEL Podcast, so women could care for themselves before a major medical crisis.

Whether it’s because we don’t think about it at the appointment or don’t want to step on anyone’s toes, we don't clearly communicate what we want to happen. They may be the professionals, but the healthcare system in America is not sustainable, making it easy to fall through the cracks. It’s a systemic failure, not necessarily the nurse or doctor, so there is no shame in speaking up for yourself. No one knows your body better than you, so if you feel something wrong, stay insistent.  

It’s also important to be transparent. You might think a symptom is unrelated or insignificant, but the more pieces you give them, the easier it will be for them to see the whole picture. A lot of times people are worried about sounding stupid or embarrassing themselves, but I can guarantee you, the doctor has seen and heard worse. It’s their job to understand what’s wrong and treat you accordingly. Whatever is on your mind in the doctor’s office, speak it, even if you think it might not be related. 

Be specific in the emotions you’re feeling or in the pain levels that you are experiencing. Be honest. Don’t downplay what you’re feeling—it will only prolong the inevitable. It does no good to lie to the people who are trying to help you and, the way I see it, you’re spending enough money on insurance and medical bills. Be clear, insistent, and recognize your value. We prioritize what we value, so make sure you’re at the top of the list. Always, always advocate for yourself. No one knows your body better than you do.

Ways To Engage: Next time you go to your doctor’s appointment, write down your questions ahead of time. Put them in your Notes app or somewhere you won’t forget, writing them down through the weeks leading up and clearly communicate what you’re feeling. 

. ✨ Free Download: Embracing a FEEL Fueled Life Sample Freebie

✨ Ready for deeper support? Visit our website to schedule a FREE complimentary 30 minute session with Melissa for support on embracing and acknowledging your emotions as clues rather than problems, and how this is acutely connected to your physical and mental health.

Episode 38 - Overcoming Anxiety, Finding Your Authentic Self & Building Resilience with Kira Hartley Klinger

By Jessica Garrison

You may know our next guest, Kira Hartley Klinger, who has been on several of our Together We FEEL “Come As Your Are” panels on YouTube, including Navigating Hope, Frustration, Joy & Connection and Capacity, Career Change, Support Systems & Self-Trust. Kira describes herself as resilient, determined, and strong, while Melissa adds the word courageous to the list. 

Kira shares with us how anxiety has taken over many areas of her life, but this is a season that has been difficult for her personally. Some days she feels good and doesn’t have a care in the world, but there are also days where she feels she can do nothing but pray for help. I’m very appreciative of our guests who are so vulnerable with us, and Kira speaks with such empathy in her voice. I agree with Melissa that courageous is a great word to describe her because it isn’t easy to share the trouble with the triumph. However, it’s perfectly normal to have some good days and some bad days—you can’t know one without the other. Progress is not linear, but we tend to have an idea in our head of how things will go. It will never be perfect like you may see in your mind because no one is perfect, but one thing for sure is that it will get better. 

Writing has always been important in Kira’s life, a self care act that allows her to be completely honest with herself. She recalls how she would get up before anyone else in her house to write, even completing 3 novels in her 20s. Though they were fiction and unpublished, her first published piece was nonfiction work in a magazine while in her 30s. This further led to her publishing Fabric Wars, detailing true stories from auctions where she buys vintage fabric for her Etsy shop. Kira says that this allows her to tell the story as herself, while being free and unapologetic. She doesn’t hold back when writing, and this activity allows her to be her most authentic self on the page. 

Through her years of experience with auctions, Kira found herself surrounded by strong women who stood up for themselves and didn’t back down in the face of adversity. It was something that she needed in her life, and it’s helped her become the woman she is today. Who we surround ourselves with impacts us more than we may think. The people in our lives can either lift us up and hope to see us succeed, or they can hold you back from living out of your own expectations and values. It’s up to you to make the choice of who you want in your circle and how you want to show up for other people. 

There’s so much amazing content here with Kira, and I encourage everyone to check out the panels she was featured in. These relevant resources will always be here to look at, so no matter where you are in your journey, we’re here. 

Ways to Engage: Start asking: Name 5 activities that nourish you, and think about which ones bring out your most authentic self. Is there one that sticks out more than the others? Hone in on this activity, how you feel while doing it, and who you are in your purest form of contentment. 

✨ Free Download: Embracing a FEEL Fueled Life Sample Freebie

✨ Ready for deeper support? Visit our website to schedule a FREE complimentary 30 minute session with Melissa for support on identifying who you are, what nourishes you, and how that shapes building your life around what you value, care about, and aligns with who you are today.
 

Episode 37 -​​​Emotions Are Clues: Why Your Feelings Matter More Than You Think with Melissa Crook

By Jessica Garrison

Do you ever feel out of control with your emotions? Or find yourself visibly upset over a small inconvenience? When we ignore our emotions, it affects us in the long run, and that’s why we’re here to remind you: Emotions Are Clues. Back with our Tuesday Empowerment episodes, Melissa Crook talks about how necessary our emotions are and why we should always be paying attention to them. There are so many times that we will feel strong emotions over something we deem small or stupid, but it isn’t at all. There is probably something more going on internally, and you’re experiencing these emotions to help you figure out the best way to move forward. When we push our emotions away or try to ignore them, it only delays the inevitable. Eventually, they make themselves known, even if it isn’t in the healthiest of ways. 

Melissa has always said that there are no “good” or “bad” emotions; they are clues to what our bodies need. Sure, certain emotions are more enjoyable to experience, but they all matter nonetheless. If you neglect your emotions, they can manifest in physical ways. You could get a headache, have chest pains, or shallow breathing from emotions that haven’t been addressed yet. You could become frustrated easier or even start lashing out if you don’t listen to the clues that your body is giving you. Even with physical pain, if you ignore it, it’ll be displayed through your emotions. The little things will continue to add up until they are addressed or until you can no longer hold it in, left wondering why you’re “crying over spilled milk.” 

Women especially have had a history of their feelings being dismissed. Sometimes they’re told they’re too emotional or have PMS, stereotypes that have only caused harm to women. Following emotional clues can lead to something major, and you have to trust yourself. Follow your instincts, take yourself seriously, and advocate for yourself because no one knows you better than you. It’s time to cast out the idea of good or bad emotions and just take them for what they are. Don’t dismiss the clues you’re getting through your emotions, and walk out as your most confident, authentic, healthiest self.  

Ways To Engage: Start thinking about your emotions in a different way. Don’t categorize them into “good” or “bad,” and allow yourself to feel each emotion fully. Don’t push it away or try to ignore what your mind and body are telling you. You’re receiving these messages for a reason. 

✨ Free Download: Embracing a FEEL Fueled Life Sample Freebie

✨ Ready for deeper support? Visit our website to schedule a FREE complimentary 30 minute session with Melissa for support on embracing and acknowledging your emotions as clues rather than problems.

Episode 36 -Embracing Your Authentic Self: Boundaries, Identity, Self-Acceptance & Personal Growth with Urmi Hossain

By Jessica Garrison

Layers are a massive part of each conversation we have on The FEEL Podcast, and our next guest from Podmatch, Urmi Hossain, hits the nail on the head perfectly. She describes herself with the three Ds: dynamic, determined, and disciplined. 

Each of our layers represents a lived experience, and they each come with a lesson. Urmi says that she has accepted herself from a cultural point of view, something that was quite difficult for her in the beginning. Hiding one of her identities to fit in, she could never be her true, authentic self. This serves as a great reminder that our layers are so personal to us, and people have battles they’re fighting that we have no idea about. Urmi has since been able to experience interactions to the fullest, not having to disguise herself based on who she’s with. 

Boundaries tie closely into this conversation, as do expectations. She used to think boundaries were selfish, but Urmi learned the hard way that boundaries are necessary no matter who you are. Knowing that she places them with good intention helps Urmi in the process, because she’s only trying to protect her peace and energy. Boundaries used to have such a negative connotation, but I feel like the narrative is switching. People are realizing what life is like when you don’t have any boundaries…and it isn’t fun. I’m glad Urmi has learned to stand up for and accept herself because she deserves it—just like we all do. 

While discussing living out FEEL, Urmi mentions the power of the tribe, which I couldn’t agree with more. I always try to talk about the importance of surrounding yourself with good people. It was a huge part of my journey, and that’s the same for a lot of others, even if they might not have realized it yet. The people in my life negatively impacted my self-esteem, so each step I took towards accepting my layers, they’d drag me back there. If you don’t have the right people behind you while you’re on the path to accepting and embracing your layers, you’ll never reach your goal. They could be in your life for a reason or for a season, so if you feel the relationship no longer serves you, there’s no shame in ending it. Be with people who lift you up, support you, and want to see you succeed. In this kind of positive atmosphere, it’s much easier to grow, and you can grow together. 

The topic of intersectionality and layers is a beautiful thing, and our differences only make us stronger. Each experience and uniqueness makes us who we are, and it’s what makes life worth living. Live life to the fullest as your most healthy, authentic, beautiful self. It’s the least you can do for yourself. 

Ways to Engage: Start asking: Name the different layers of yourself, starting small with what you look like on the outside. Now, what’s your personality like? Your job? Your hobbies? Keep listing the layers and explore deeper. Be patient, be kind, and be curious. 

Episode 35 -Healing from Trauma: Self-Love, Emotional Healing, and Finding Your Voice with Pamela Michaux

By Jessica Garrison

Episode trigger warning: mentions of abuse 

Looking to start your journey of healing but not sure where to begin? Our next guest, Pamela Michaux, joins us from Malta to share lived experiences. She describes herself as a chameleon, adaptable, and someone who is able to go with the flow. 

A huge part of Pamela’s journey, she says, was learning to love herself, something that so many of us have to learn to do. We think we like ourselves enough, but once we’re faced with harsh reality, it’s apparent that there’s a lot of unhealed layers. Allow the things that hurt you to have space; If you constantly push it down, then there’s no room for the hurt to breathe and, therefore, no room to heal. Pamela says healing is a journey—there’s ups and downs, but you have to keep putting one foot in front of the other. It’s easy to blame yourself for past mistakes, but it’s time to forgive yourself and learn from it.  

Pamela shares with us that one of the most important parts of the healing journey is to share your emotions. It’s difficult at first, especially if you’re not used to doing it. So many times, especially as children, we’re told to suck it up or to hide our emotions so we don’t make others uncomfortable. Your feelings are valid and just because someone else has different emotions about an experience doesn’t make yours any less real. It’s only when we explore our emotions do we understand ourselves better. Pamela encourages everyone to practice naming your emotions and writing them down. Bit by bit, you’re able to improve on sharing your emotions with others in a way that is healthy and freeing. 

Remember, there is no shame in asking for help. It’s okay not to be okay. We try to be strong for those around us, but we are not responsible for other people. Pamela serves as a great reminder that only you can tell your story. At The Embracing Layers Network, we work so hard so women have as many resources as they need to be able to reach out and get the treatment they deserve. Pamela says the only person you have to tolerate is yourself, which reminds me of something similar a friend told me in high school. We’ll be with ourselves forever, so you ought to make sure you like yourself. 

Pamela gives us a great quote in the episode: “The only way to reduce your fears is to face them.” She admits it’s scary to do so, but if you continue to run from your fears, you’ll be running forever. Her memoir, Mundele Diaries, is available on Amazon where she dives deeper into her story with vulnerability, grace, and strength. Listen to Pamela’s episode and start healing from the inside out today.

Ways to Engage: Start asking: Next time you want to go to someone for advice, stop and think about if someone you love came to you with the same question. What would you tell them? How would you speak to them? Take your own advice, be patient, and trust yourself.

Resources: 

• Sexual Abuse

  • Call 800-656-HOPE (4673)

  • Text HOPE to 64673

  • Chat online with someone at RAINN.org 

• Physical Abuse 

  • Call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)

  • Text START to 88788

  • Chat online with someone at TheHotline.org

Episode 34 -Become the Woman You're Meant to Be: How Your Core Values Shape Your Purpose with Eva Kennedy

By Jessica Garrison

If someone were to ask you to name your top 5 priorities in order, could you do it? Do these priorities reflect your why and your values? Our next guest is a pursuant person who is the Values Queen. Eva Kennedy lives in her purpose, always pursuing it, and she also serves women. She lives in that and thrives in that, knowing who she is and just how beautiful of a person she is. 

Eva tells us that she was married to her job, working 29 years in the corporate world. This changed when she was diagnosed with breast cancer, of which she was free of for 5 years after radiation treatment. Her priorities began shifting, and it was time to leave her that job because it no longer served her. This launched her into her journey of discovering what truly mattered to her and to her soul. Mentally and physically, she was exhausted. She hadn’t taken the time to process her cancer journey, and she also was moving her life in a new direction. Eva says that she was looking outside for her purpose, but it was within her all along. We always want to encourage women to discover themselves and embrace their layers so they can find this within, too. 

Eva describes her values as tools or a roadmap. They help help to guide you in your decision making based on what’s important to you, and it’s crucial to have them. Otherwise, other people will decide for you what’s important, and that’s when you start to live out of other people’s expectations rather than your own. It’s a process that happens over time, and Eva reminds us that’s it’s okay to need help along the way. It’s why we provide as many resources as we can, so women are able to take that first step in their journey and decide for themselves how they want to live. Everyone’s values and choices will look different, but the outside noise shouldn’t matter. It’s for you to know and feel good about, not others. 

Who are you? What do you want? Be truthful with yourself when you ask these questions. Otherwise, you won’t be getting the most out of your experiences. Remember to give yourself grace during this time of discovery. So many people feel stuck and don’t know how to move forward, but like us, Eva wants to help women with their journey. Her website details her services, links her book, and offers the opportunity to learn more about the community she has created. I’ll leave one last quote that really stuck with me, and I hope it can help inspire you: “Become the woman you know you are meant to be.” 

Ways to Engage: Start asking: List your Top 5 Values in order of priority. Take time to think about it, reflect, and determine what is truly valuable to you and your life. Use this list to help guide you through tough decision making and bring you back to yourself when you feel lost. 

Episode 33 -Why You're Always Tired: The Hidden Truth About Sleep, Sleep Apnea & Reclaiming Your Health with Nathalie Walton

By Jessica Garrison

Do you always find yourself saying you’re tired, even when you think you got enough hours of sleep the night before? Our sleep and our health are linked together so strongly, and our next guest, Nathalie Walton, has so much knowledge and grace to share with listeners. Nathalie describes herself as intentional and ascending, two beautiful words that perfectly encapsulates her as a person.   

Sleep is always a funny topic to me because we all do it, we need it to survive, and yet, we don’t treat it that way at all. Some people see sleep as optional or an inconvenience that they try to do as little as possible. I remember in college, other students would brag about pulling an all-nighter to study or to get an assignment done. However, it’s scientifically proven how not getting enough sleep can affect you, and Nathalie has both professional as well as personal experiences with this. Even Melissa has experience with sleep apnea, a condition that “causes repeated stops and starts in breathing during sleep.” Since she didn’t match the “average profile” of someone with sleep apnea, the idea was dismissed at first. In comparison, Nathalie discovered her son had sleep apnea at 4 years old (also not in the demographic). Since your body is fighting to get enough oxygen, you can’t fully relax, and it deeply affects your sleep, even if you don’t know it at first. This is such an important lesson to learn in the world of medicine and treatment: advocate for yourself. Even if you don’t match a specific profile, if you have the symptoms and know something is wrong, continue to fight for yourself. 

When she was post-partum, Nathalie also suffered from sleep apnea, but people dismissed her exhaustion due to being a new mom. She also had anemia, which was affecting her energy. No matter who you are, what you do, or what you look like, everyone needs healthy sleep. If not, it affects your mind, your body, your thought process, everything. It’s another reminder to look at the whole picture, because the root of the problem could be affecting multiple things. 

Nathalie wants to normalize the conversations surrounding this so people don’t feel embarrassed to share their stories. She said that, for example, people are sometimes embarrassed to admit they snore, but Nathalie reminds everyone that it is not a big deal. Doctors need the whole picture as well to be able to figure out what’s going on. 

Since Nathalie is a general manager for BetterSleep, a sleep and meditation app that helps you with relaxation and sleep, you can try it out for one free month! See what tools you can utilize and discover what helps best. If you like it, keep it! Continue to work on your sleep journey, because it is just as important as other aspects of your health. 

Ways to Engage: Start asking: Download the BetterSleep app and take note of what helps, what doesn’t, and what other options you may want to pursue. Track your sleep, write down questions to ask your doctor, and be sure you are giving your body the rest it deserves. 

Episode 32 -From Perfectionism to Peace: Setting Boundaries, Prioritizing Self-Care & Preventing Burnout with Rosamaria Mancini

By Jessica Garrison

We’re thrilled to feature our next guest, Rosamaria Mancini. She describes herself as hospitable, someone who hates disorder, and she finds joy in giving. Rosamaria is a perfectionist, sometimes to the annoyance of the people around her. If there’s a type of person who benefits from The FEEL Podcast, it’s definitely perfectionists. 

Boundaries tend to be a struggle for women, and Rosamaria was no different in her own journey. She recalls feeling guilty when she carved out time for herself, a natural emotion that comes up when you start putting yourself first. If you aren’t used to it, it feels selfish, rather than selfless. However, you don’t have to make a self care routine that is two hours long every day, you only need a few minutes here and there. It’s about creating something sustainable for yourself that you can keep up with and that keeps up with you from day to day. Take five minutes here and there to journal, or take twenty minutes to meditate. What you need each day can also vary, so listen to your body while you figure out your self care regime. 

In turn, Rosamaria’s health was being affected by not having boundaries set or taking care of herself. When working on her PhD, Rosamaria says that she felt physically ill from the stress. However, being in academia, she was worried about judgment. People tend to pride themselves on working for days on end without a break or staying up all night to finish a paper, but there isn’t anything productive in that, although it may seem like it at first. This just causes suffering in the long run because eventually, you’ll burn out. Have some ways to pick yourself back up when needed, and look for the signs of when you need it.  

Rosamaria was looking for a solution, but as she says, “You cannot sustain such high levels of stress with no sense of peace.” You will start to shut down, whether it’s your mind or your body. There’s no magic potion that “fixes” everything. This is why we call it a journey. There isn’t a clear road map that tells you exactly what to do, and there is no one size fits all. You have to get to know yourself, accept those layered aspects of yourself, and heal from the inside out. 

Rosamaria wrote a book entitled, SOS Podcasts, a memoir that details how podcasts helped her feel not so alone in an unfamiliar world. It just goes to show how powerful podcasts and their messages are. It led Rosamaria to finding herself, led us to each other, and hopefully will help women find themselves all over the world.  

Ways to Engage: Start asking: Think of some differing self care activities that can vary in time. Whether it be journaling, reading, going for a walk, meditating, biking, listening to music, or whatever you choose, find what nourishes your soul. Figure out what works best day to day and always remember to listen to your body. 

Episode 31 -​​​The FEEL Podcast Celebrates 5 Years of Healing, Self-Care & Women's Empowerment

By Jessica Garrison

We’ve reached an incredible milestone for The FEEL Podcast: our five year anniversary! The FEEL Podcast first premiered on July 12, 2021 with Emotional Health & Physical Health Connection to our Overall Wellbeing with Melissa Crook. Since then, we have published 10 seasons with 266 episodes, a book, a radio show, an online course (celebrating its one year anniversary), and more incredible ways to connect to our content. It gives me goosebumps thinking about everything we have accomplished and the lives we have changed in the last five years, and it gives me excitement to think of what’s to come next.

Melissa shares in detail the health journey that led her to creating The FEEL Podcast in our book and in that very first episode, but a huge motivator was that she didn’t want anyone else to have to go through what she did. With the talking points of self care, boundaries, all aspects of health, supporting women in living unapologetically, values, expectations, layers, and living out FEEL, Melissa had set up a great resource for women like herself.

Our platform is for anyone, but we realized the specific need for this content in women’s spaces. As a culture and society, we expect women to put everyone else first and give themselves the scraps, if there are even any left to have. We want women to fill up their own cups first, then pour excess into others. Everyone is deserving of love, respect, and kindness. Above all else, you should be showing these things to yourself, not just others. It is never too late to start over and begin a new journey, healing to the point of rediscovering your healthiest, most authentic self.

We are celebrating with this blog and a live episode tomorrow (7/14/26) on YouTube! Melissa will be bringing back past guests to share their FEEL experiences, as well as releasing a recording with Leslie Draffin. Leslie is the guest of our most popular episode so far, Unmasking the Layers: Eating Disorders, Sexual Shame & the Journey to Self-Healing. The live celebration will begin at 12 PM EST/9 AM PST and Leslie’s segment will drop 15 minutes before. We can’t wait to reminisce with everyone on the impactful stories we’ve heard over the past five years as we continue to share resources for all to begin their journey of FEEL.

Ways To Engage: Join us live on YouTube at 12 PM EST/9 AM PST for our anniversary celebration! Ask questions, share your favorite episodes, and tell us the quotes you live by. Discover everything The Embracing Layers Network has to offer. Listen to past episodes, read our book, complete the coursework, or schedule private time with Melissa to work on one on one. Start prioritizing yourself today and inspire others to do the same.

✨ Free Download: Embracing a FEEL Fueled Life Sample Freebie

✨ Ready for deeper support? Visit our website to schedule a complimentary 30 minute session or learn more about FEEL’s 5th Anniversary with Melissa

Episode 30 -Money Mindset, Financial Boundaries & Guilt-Free Spending with Linda Grizely

By Jessica Garrison

Podmatch has yet again connected us to an amazing woman named Linda Grizely. She describes herself as an empowering, compassionate, grounded, and reflective truth-teller, all of which comes to light in her episode.

Linda works in the world of finances, so boundaries are at the forefront of a lot of conversations she has. Women especially are made to feel like they don’t know what they’re doing with their money, or that they’re being irresponsible when they buy something for themselves. Linda mentions the feeling of guilt, and I immediately perked up. I feel guilt all of the time when I buy something for myself because I feel like I’m spending my money recklessly, and I think many other women can relate to this feeling. However, Linda gives a great way to help release the guilt when you are buying something for yourself. She has her own “Me Money” budget set aside each month, so that whenever she wants to buy something for herself, she can pull from there. In the episode, she spoke about how she used this method with her husband, and it helped him make better choices with his money. I think this is such a great idea as well as a way to help you get started with budgeting or saving if that is new to you. 

We’re all about meeting people where they are, and Linda agrees completely, because that is the best thing you can do for anyone to show support. Some of the clients she works with could have experience with finances, or it might be the first time they’re really thinking about it. Either way, Linda can help people from their starting point, rather than having the same expectations of each person. It wouldn’t help them get to that advanced space, and it wouldn’t lead them to making the right decision for themselves. This way, she works with clients to develop the best plan of action for themselves, and they can become more educated on the subject that serves them. 

One other point I want to touch on is the inclusion of your emotions surrounding money. Linda says to think about your emotions when sitting down to write out the bills. Do you feel anxious because there is more going out than there is coming in? Do you feel relieved that everything is taken care of now and you can focus on yourself? It’s a great way to gauge where you are and where you want to go. 

You can check out Linda’s books on her website to read how this has affected real people in real time. There are plenty of gems in this episode to hold onto, and I hope everyone takes that first step towards treating themselves well. 

Ways to Engage: Start asking: Create your own monthly budget for your “Me Money.” Pick however much you want to give to yourself to spend and stick to that budget. Save it for something more expensive, spend it on a nice dinner, whatever you want. Stop feeling guilty about spending money and feel more empowered. 

Episode 29 -​​Summer Body Expectations: Building Body Confidence, Setting Boundaries & Embracing Self-Acceptance with Melissa Crook

By Jessica Garrison

We are officially in the swing of summer and with that comes a lot of sun and fun, but it also comes with insecurity. Summer Body Expectations have been around for decades and they are still alive in our culture today, but we continue the conversation as we work towards everyone feeling free and safe in their own body. I do not know a woman who is not self-conscious of her body, even if she has society’s version of a perfect body. People will have opinions no matter what you do or look like, and there’s nothing you can do to stop them. However, there is a way to deal with it, become confident in your own skin, and defy any expectations someone may have of you.

The number one thing to remember is it starts with yourself. Do not comment on other people’s bodies. Even if you think you’re being complimentary towards them, you don’t know what their internal struggle may be. A friend of mine recently lost weight and everyone has been commenting on it, to the point where she didn’t want to go see people and have to explain yet again why she’s lost weight. Even if you’re trying to be complimentary, keep it to yourself. If you are concerned for someone, then there is a way to approach it without judgment and not in a public setting where they could feel shame. So many times, people don’t want to go out in specific clothes or a certain setting, like a swimming pool, in fear of the  judgment, stares, or comments they’re going to get. Again, you can’t stop them, but you can let it go in one ear and out the other. Set your boundaries, live out of your own expectations, and take care of all aspects of yourself. 

There’s another statement I have to make and, even though it’s simple, it’s necessary. It is summer. It is hot outside. If men can be shirtless, then women should be able to go out in whatever they want, too. She is not asking for anything other than to be comfortable. Men do not sacrifice their comfort in clothing, so neither should we. In times like this, I don’t typically wear a bra, and so many people feel the need to share their opinion with me. I am not looking for attention or for someone to comment on my chest. I just want to feel comfortable in the sun, and if someone has a problem with it, they can avert their eyes. Put yourself and your health first, then forget the rest. It’s easier said than done, but the more you practice, the better you’ll get at it. 

There are plenty of conversations to listen to or read about on our Substack page, from our Summer Body Expectations blog to our radio show episode. Many of our guests have also talked about their own experiences in dealing with uncomfortability in their own bodies, no matter the season. Remember that you deserve to feel beautiful because you are. You are worthy of taking up space, and you get to choose.    

Ways To Engage: Listen to some of our past episodes involving body expectations, the radio show, and/or read the blog, taking notes of what you feel is valuable for you. Put these lessons into practice. Tell yourself in the mirror that you and your body are beautiful every day, even when you don’t feel like it.

Join Melissa LIVE on our Substack (https://substack.com/@thefeelpodcast) for this week's Empowerment Tuesday conversation at 8 am PST/11 am EST. You can also catch it later in the day on your favorite podcast platforms.

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✨ Ready for deeper support? Visit our website to schedule a complimentary 30 minute session to start to learn more about Healthy Summer Body Expectations with Melissa.

Episode 28 -The Power of Putting Yourself First with Val Jones: Overcoming People Pleasing & Embracing Self-Care

By Jessica Garrison

Episode trigger warning: Mentions of emotional abuse 

Val Jones joins us this week as she shares her story of learning that taking care of yourself is not selfish. She describes herself as a disruptive, sacred, unapologetic and intuitive visionary. Keep an eye out for news on Melissa joining Val later on her podcast, The Selfish Woman.

As most women, Val was conditioned to be a people pleaser with Good Girl Syndrome. Everything she did, she did for others. To make them happy, to make them like her, whatever it was, she was doing for everyone else instead of herself. Finally, she took a year to be selfish, a year for everything to be about her and for her. Val makes the excellent point that we have changed the meaning of words before, so there’s no reason we can’t change the meaning of the word “selfish.” Selfish is not the same term we learned many years ago where we think we should be putting everyone else above ourselves and never ask for anything…ever. It can mean joy and abundance, rather than being associated with someone you don’t want to be around. Being selfish is not negative; it is taking care of yourself and putting yourself first, something we should all learn to do. 

In supporting women in living unapologetically, Val says that she had to live it out first. Everything starts with yourself. If you want to create a change, you have to become that change, but this in turn causes a ripple effect for those around you. Once people see you living your healthiest, most authentic life, they’ll think, “I want to do that, and I can.” It’s inspiring to see someone you love and admire taking those first steps for themselves. Val says, “It’s beyond ourselves, but it starts with us,” and I couldn’t agree more.  

Val said that for her journey to be successful, she had to get in tune with her mind, body, and soul. She had spent so much time stuffing her feelings and filling the space with anything else that she didn’t even know what was best for herself. Sitting with yourself in silence is something that makes many people very uncomfortable, but that’s just what is needed. If you don’t know yourself to the core, then who does? Who knows what you truly desire or how you really feel other than you? That’s why it is so important to take care of yourself and be selfish. Your life begins to change in small ways but also in exponential ways. Some results you see immediately and some take time, but you feel them nonetheless. 

Val wrote a book entitled The Selfish Year: The Power of Putting Yourself First about the year she described earlier of putting herself first. She continues to empower women with her book and podcast, and I love that we were able to add Val to our list of amazing women to know.

Ways to Engage: Start asking, “What’s wrong?” rather than, “What’s wrong with me?” Nothing is wrong with you, but if there is something that is bothering you, dig deeper without blaming yourself. How you frame your words, especially internally, is so important to how you think of yourself. Be kind, be patient, and be curious. 

Episode 27 -​​Communicating Boundaries & Expectations: The Missing Piece of Healthy Relationships with Melissa Crook

By Jessica Garrison

As we carry on the conversation of living out FEEL, we need to narrow in on the subject of communication. Communicating our Boundaries and Expectations is just as important as setting them. No one is a mind reader, so we have to be very clear in how we expect to be treated and respected. It becomes especially important when you are making changes in your behavior to relay that information to people so they know about your new boundaries and expectations. 

For example, let’s say that you have decided to make Mondays a day with no meetings whatsoever. It’s a new boundary you’re starting because you want more time to get work done in the office, but your coworkers won’t be aware of this change until you tell them. They’ll continue to ask for a meeting Monday, not because they’re trying to disrespect your boundaries, but because they don’t know about them. These conversations can show up in a multitude of ways, but this is just one simple example to help you think of ways you can communicate boundaries and expectations in your own life. It might take some time, or some people may not be receptive to them, but you have to at least communicate with them so everyone can be on the same page. It’s at that point people will show themselves to you as an actual supporter or someone who’s just using you for personal gain.

Change is difficult, but the more you practice communicating, the more natural it will feel. This piece also helps to keep you accountable. Once you say something, you have to stick by it, or else people won’t take your words seriously. If you don’t tell anyone, then they’ll keep up the same routine without realizing how much you are struggling. If they know your goal, they can help you pursue it and support you when others may be pushing that boundary. The more you speak it aloud, the more it will make it true, so keep up with your accountability as well by communicating your needs. A closed mouth doesn’t get fed, so if you want something, ask for it. If you don’t think you’re getting treated right, say something. There’s no way for people to tell what is going on inside our heads unless we tell them. 

We teach people how to treat us, and how can they learn without your assistance? It can feel selfish or mean at first, but above all else, communication is kind. Join Melissa live every Tuesday for her empowerment episodes at 11 am EST/8 am PST on Substack! Ask questions and jump in on the conversation, sharing how you intend to communicate your boundaries and expectations.

Ways To Engage: Think about your expectations and boundaries, and think about the last time you properly communicated them. Choose someone close to you, a safe person, and try communicating these things to them. Get practice, even starting small if you need, and start working towards a greater scale to become more confident in your abilities.  

Join Melissa LIVE on our Substack (https://substack.com/@thefeelpodcast) for this week's Empowerment Tuesday conversation at 8 am PST/11 am EST. You can also catch it later in the day on your favorite podcast platforms.

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✨ Ready for deeper support? Visit our website to schedule a complimentary 30 minute session to start effectively communicating your healthy boundaries and expectations, no over-explaining or apologizing necessary.

Episode 26 -Fertility, Empowerment, Healthy Boundaries & Reproductive Education with Bilge Apak Sato and Valerie Kvita

By Jessica Garrison

We have double the guests for this episode which means double the fun and double the amazement! We are featuring Bilge Apak Sato and Valerie Kvita, who are based in Switzerland. Bilge describes herself as an empathetic and passionate advocate who feels a lot. Similarly, Valerie describes herself as empathetic, curious, and enthusiastic. 

Bilge and Valerie’s work involves fertility, a conversation that is prevalent in so many of our lives but isn’t talked about as such. Whether it be a couple trying to get pregnant, a woman who is already a mother, or a teenager figuring out sex for the first time, fertility is a necessary topic, And this doesn’t only include women. Men are just as involved with fertility or infertility as women are, but again, these areas aren’t discussed as much. Each of our talking points are crucial to this conversation, but Confidently Setting Healthy Boundaries was the one that stuck out to me the most in its traits and relevance. 

Trying to get pregnant is one of the most vulnerable stages of life, Bilge says, and boundaries online can change your whole experience with this. When you’re going through something sensitive, there’s no controlling what someone else may say or post that’s triggering for you. For myself, I use a social media time limit on my phone so after a certain amount of time scrolling, it stops me. This can be especially helpful while experiencing something delicate, or even if you find yourself on your phone too much doomscrolling. You can also block specific words that may be triggering. Valerie emphasizes that it is your mind, your body, your life. If you don’t take care of yourself and put yourself first, then who will? 

The work that Bilge and Valerie offer is all about information and education, allowing people to make an informed decision of what they want to do. Together they created The Tiny Pea, “a fertility education platform,” along with their book I Am Magic: The Ultimate Fertility Workbook for Empowerment, Choice, & Self-Love on Amazon. Even if you think it’s too early or too late, you can still purchase the workbook and refer to it when applicable. 

You can tell just by listening to these women speak how important this topic is for them and how much passion they feel for the cause. Their intelligence, drive, and sensitivity make them such powerful women who are actively changing the world, and we’re so thankful we were able to share their story with you.   

Ways to Engage:  Educate yourself on a topic that you are unfamiliar with, even if you think it doesn’t apply to you. For example, if you’re a man, educate yourself on a female sport’s team, or vice versa. Challenge yourself to consume information and become more well-rounded on subjects you may not have thought important before. 

Episode 25 -​Pause Before You Say “Yes”: The Secret to Stronger Boundaries with Melissa Crook

By Jessica Garrison

We talked last week about saying “No” without overexplaining, which leads us perfectly into The Power of the Pause Before Giving a “Yes” conversation with Melissa. When we are living in our people pleaser world, we get used to saying yes as soon as someone asks us for a favor. It isn’t until later that we think about it and regret saying “yes.” There is great power in the pause, giving yourself time to consider what you want before answering in a way that they want. 

I think it’s a lot easier to say “no” the first time, rather than saying “yes” and trying to figure a way out of it later. Not only does it put you in an uncomfortable position, but it also does an injustice to the person asking the question. After your response, they can ask someone else who has the time or bandwidth without worrying if they actually mean yes or no. Your time and energy are valuable, though we don’t always treat them as much. It’s important to take a minute, consider the pros and cons, then make a proper decision based on that. Imagine if you said “yes” out of kindness to something you didn’t want to do, but then you have to say “no” to something you did want to do because of that prior engagement. When you say “yes” to something, you are saying “no” to something else, so make sure you’re accepting the things you want. 

When people ask me something, I say, “Let me check my schedule,” even if I know what my schedule already looks like. I want to take the time to look over the week, consider the possibilities, and give an answer after the fact. If I want to do something, I’ll give them a strong consideration and say I will confirm with you later. It keeps open the possibility that you have something else going on, and that is okay, too. If you don’t, you get back to them with a firm yes. If you want to say no, then you say, “I can’t, but maybe another time.” Leave the long-winded explanation out of the answer, and you can be confident in that answer because you took the time to consider what you wanted. 

This topic ties into so many of our past conversations, particularly surrounding boundaries and expectations. If you’re the type of person to always say “yes,” people will be more likely to come to you for favors. You still have the right to say “no” to whatever you like, but it becomes more difficult because, let’s face it, it’s nice when people depend on us. We feel wanted and important, but you have to have those boundaries with others as well as yourself. Dig deeper into your soul and maybe ask, why do you always feel the need to say yes? And why do you need to say it right away? Consider these questions along with the ways to engage and give yourself that power of the pause. 

Ways To Engage:  Before saying yes or no to someone, wait 24 hours. Consider your options and formulate how you want to tell that person. Remember, don’t overexplain. Your feelings are valid, so be sure you’re doing right by them and yourself by accepting and declining what you want to.  

Join Melissa LIVE on our Substack (https://substack.com/@thefeelpodcast) for this week's Empowerment Tuesday conversation at 8 am PST/11 am EST. You can also catch it later in the day on your favorite podcast platforms.

✨ Free Download: Embracing a FEEL Fueled Life Sample Freebie

✨ Ready for deeper support? Visit our website to schedule a complimentary 30 minute session or learn more about Living Out The FEEL Framework with Melissa

Episode 24 -The Truth About Skin Health, Inflammaging, and Beauty Industry Myths with Dr. Ebru Karpuzoglu

By Jessica Garrison

We are so lucky to feature our next guest, Dr. Ebru Karpuzoglu. She is hyper, headstrong, and loves challenges. Melissa also says she has a humble confidence in her. Wherever she goes, people meet her and want to tell her their stories, but this time, we get to hear hers. 

Ebru’s work includes skin wellness and she tells us about the many factors that can affect your skin. She uses the term inflammaging, inflammation and aging together, because of the inflammation that wears down your body and your skin that causes you to look older than you actually are. Chronic inflammation can also occur with constantly high cortisol levels causing this, and Ebru has the scientific research to back up her claims. However, people were not necessarily taking her information to heart because she had published research papers rather than a book. So she created her book, Empire of Mirrors: Exposé of Beauty Untold, as a new way for people to see her research on skin health. Her work is fascinating to me because I love discussing skin care, and Ebru shares more than just what’s on the surface.

I admire Ebru because her goal has always been to convey the truth and it is what she continues to do. We see a lot of marketing manipulation, especially in the world of makeup and skincare. Rather than letting people fall victim to whatever the big companies are serving up, Ebru has put her work into a book that can be read by anyone and allow a person to make an informed decision before they purchase a product. The system was not built for women, so we have to build our own system that works for us, and within this system, Ebru welcomes everyone to the table. She especially likes to support women-owned businesses because of the competition mindset that many women are brought up with. Everyone has something to contribute and is a necessary part of the conversation.  Ebru says that “her success doesn’t diminish mine.” A lot of times there are no or only a few women in the room, so we feel like there aren’t as many positions for us, so we have to compete with each other for them. But that is not true at all. We should be lifting each other up, defending one another, and questioning why there aren’t more women in the room. The enemy is the patriarchy, not other women. 

Ebru has her own website that features her skin care products, frequent concerns or questions, and a quiz you can take to see what fits best for your skin. Your skin is a huge indicator of your health, so this is a topic that I think everyone could use more education on. It isn’t vain or selfish to take care of yourself in all areas of your life. 

Ways to Engage:  Get curious about marketing techniques or cues that seem manipulative. Are they trying to get you to compare yourself to others? Are they trying to uplift everyone rather than pulling someone else down to look better? Are they being transparent with their work? Start with the beauty industry and continue to expand to all media to become more aware of manipulation in marketing.

Episode 23 -No More Overexplaining: Why "No" Is a Complete Sentence with Melissa Crook

By Jessica Garrison

When you say “no” to someone’s request, do you feel the need to give a long, drawn out explanation as to why you gave that answer? Whether it’s a legitimate reason or you just felt like saying no? If this sounds like you, keep reading! We’ve had so many guests bring this up in the past, with Melissa even saying she used to be the overexplaining champion of the world. It’s so important we keep having this conversation, so we continue our empowerment Tuesdays as Melissa discusses No More Overexplaining : “No” is a Complete Sentence. We want everyone to be able to say “no” without the explanation after. The answer of “yes” or “no” should be enough.

This goes side by side with boundaries, and it can be difficult when you finally start saying “no” to people to not give excuse after excuse as to why you can’t. Set the boundary within yourself that you won’t explain when you say “no,” you will just add the period to the end. The people in your life who respect you rather than what you can do for them will accept your answer, and these are some of the best people to have in your life. It’s inspiring to see each other in action, and you can be each other’s “accountability partner” along the way. 

I think the most important lesson to take from this is the understanding that you, as well as your time, are valuable. You shouldn’t have to explain to someone why you can or cannot do something, but the battle is usually within ourselves. Most of the time, the other person isn’t even looking for an explanation as to why you said “no,” but they are just looking for an answer. We make up a lot of narratives in our heads that aren't necessarily true, so we need to take a moment and return to reality when we start to tell ourselves a different story. If people aren’t used to this behavior, there might be some push back, but remember your strength and stand by your boundaries; you set them for a reason. 

It might be a process to get there, but it’s totally worth it, so just keep that end result in the back of your mind when practicing. If this is something you feel you need extra support with, Melissa is available for sessions to connect with your personal story or situation. Join us Tuesdays at 2 PM EST/11 AM PST for Melissa’s live empowerment episodes and comment any questions you may have for her. Start putting yourself first. You deserve it. 

Ways To Engage:  Next time you say no to something, leave it at that. Reflect on what you would have said when overexplaining and why you maybe would have said that. Is there something deeper going on internally? Are there layers that still need to be embraced or uncovered? 

Join Melissa LIVE on our Substack (https://substack.com/@thefeelpodcast) for this week's Empowerment Tuesday conversation. You can also catch it later in the day on your favorite podcast platforms.

✨ Free Download: Embracing a FEEL Fueled Life Sample Freebie

✨ Ready for deeper support? Visit our website to schedule a complimentary 30 minute session or learn more about Living Out The FEEL Framework with Melissa

Episode 22 -Living Your Purpose: Faith, Family, Legacy & Authentic Growth with Eileen Noyes

By Jessica Garrison

Eileen Noyes is a guest who connected with us through email, and her story as well as her work align with us so perfectly. She is a patient, flexible, and encouraging go-getter.

Eileen’s why and values are wrapped in 3 big things: honoring God, living out His purpose, and understanding the importance of legacy. She has 8 children of her own and her husband has 7 of his own, so legacy is very important to her. It’s about making sure that her children are growing up with everything they need to take on the world with the same compassion, drive, and awareness that Eileen has. The second part of her why is to honor God and whatever His purpose for her may be. She says that she used to have a shopping addiction, but it served no purpose for any of these values and was more about materialistic items than the experience. She doesn’t want to waste time on things that won’t matter in a few years or even a few weeks. Instead, she puts her effort towards these 3 things and the rest comes along with it. When you truly live out of your why and your values, everything else starts to make sense.  

In terms of her expectations, Eileen thinks to herself, who am I really? I think this ties in beautifully with her values because if you are truly living out your values like Eileen is, then the  expectations of others don’t affect you as much. Eileen is anchored in who she is, with a thick skin and forgiving heart, which are some of the best tools to bring with you on your journey. She says that we waste a lot of time defending ourselves when people become judgmental, but they will think what they want to think at the end of the day anyway. People will always have opinions, and you truly cannot please everyone, so what’s the sense in trying? The most important person is yourself because it’s your life, so you have to be the one who is happy with it.

Eileen says that we tend to look for evidence of what we’re thinking internally, which I couldn’t agree more with. For example, if you think someone at work hates you, then you subconsciously piece evidence together that proves the theory you made up in your head. Any tone they have might be received as harsh, even if they don’t mean it that way. So make sure the stories you are telling yourself are factual, and it’s better to err on the side of caution in your own mind when it starts being negative. 

There’s a new appreciation Eileen has for life, becoming a healthier version of herself for her own needs and her children’s. It is a version that is genuinely authentic and takes care of herself in addition to others. This is a beautiful episode to showcase how much room there is to grow, even when you think you’ve got it all. Remember that there is a reason and a season for everything, so there’s always the chance to evolve.

Ways to Engage: Name 3 big things that are important to you that you can base your why and your values around like Eileen has. Is it family? Is it God? Is it a career path? Whatever they may be, remember them in decisions you make, big or small, and see how much richer your life becomes living out of your values every day. 

Episode 21 - Breaking the “I’m Sorry” Habit: What Over-Apologizing Revealed About My Self-Worth, Boundaries, and Healing with Melissa Crook

By Melissa Crook

Before we begin, a quick note from me. Most weeks, our gifted author, Jessica Garrison, writes the blogs that accompany our episodes. But this week's conversation touches on a journey that has been profoundly personal and transformative in my own life. Because of that, I felt called to put the words on the page myself and share this story directly with you. 

How many times a day do you say, "I'm sorry"?

Not because you've done something wrong, but because you've taken up space, asked for what you need, changed your mind, expressed an opinion, or simply existed.

For years, I apologized for things that weren't my fault, responsibility, or burden to carry. It became so automatic that I didn't even realize I was doing it. "I'm sorry" had become a reflex- response so deeply ingrained that I rarely questioned it.

Looking back, I can see how early conditioning taught me that being "too much" was a problem to solve. Somewhere along the way, I learned that other people's comfort mattered more than my own needs, opinions, and boundaries. So I became skilled at minimizing myself, smoothing things over, and apologizing for things that never required an apology.

The turning point came much later in life when I began paying closer attention to my inner dialogue. What I discovered surprised me. Beneath the surface was a pattern I had carried for decades; one that was quietly shaping how I showed up in relationships, conversations, decisions, and even the way I moved through the world.

What I didn't know then was that breaking the "I'm sorry" habit would lead me to uncover something even deeper.

It wasn't just about the words.

It was about self-value.

It was about boundaries.

It was about permission.

And it was about learning that my existence is not an inconvenience.

The process of changing this habit wasn't easy, but it transformed the way I communicate, advocate for myself, and navigate relationships. Along the way, I also discovered another behavior that often travels hand-in-hand with chronic apologizing, one that many women struggle with without even realizing it.

In this week's Empowerment Tuesday episode of The FEEL Podcast, I'll share the surprising ways over-apologizing shows up in everyday life, where it often comes from, and some of the tools that helped me begin rewriting the story.

You may recognize yourself in more of this conversation than you expect.

Ways To Engage:  This week, pay attention to how often you say "I'm sorry."

Are you actually apologizing for something you've done wrong?

Or are you apologizing for having needs, taking up space, setting a boundary, or simply being human?

You might be surprised by what you discover.

Join me LIVE on our Substack (https://substack.com/@thefeelpodcast) for this week's Empowerment Tuesday conversation. You can also catch it later in the day on your favorite podcast platforms. Either way, I have a feeling it's one you won't want to miss.

✨ Free Download: Embracing a FEEL Fueled Life Sample Freebie

✨ Ready for deeper support? Visit our website to schedule a complimentary 30 minute session or learn more about Living Out The FEEL Framework with Melissa