Episode 29 -Summer Body Expectations: Building Body Confidence, Setting Boundaries & Embracing Self-Acceptance with Melissa Crook
By Jessica Garrison
We are officially in the swing of summer and with that comes a lot of sun and fun, but it also comes with insecurity. Summer Body Expectations have been around for decades and they are still alive in our culture today, but we continue the conversation as we work towards everyone feeling free and safe in their own body. I do not know a woman who is not self-conscious of her body, even if she has society’s version of a perfect body. People will have opinions no matter what you do or look like, and there’s nothing you can do to stop them. However, there is a way to deal with it, become confident in your own skin, and defy any expectations someone may have of you.
The number one thing to remember is it starts with yourself. Do not comment on other people’s bodies. Even if you think you’re being complimentary towards them, you don’t know what their internal struggle may be. A friend of mine recently lost weight and everyone has been commenting on it, to the point where she didn’t want to go see people and have to explain yet again why she’s lost weight. Even if you’re trying to be complimentary, keep it to yourself. If you are concerned for someone, then there is a way to approach it without judgment and not in a public setting where they could feel shame. So many times, people don’t want to go out in specific clothes or a certain setting, like a swimming pool, in fear of the judgment, stares, or comments they’re going to get. Again, you can’t stop them, but you can let it go in one ear and out the other. Set your boundaries, live out of your own expectations, and take care of all aspects of yourself.
There’s another statement I have to make and, even though it’s simple, it’s necessary. It is summer. It is hot outside. If men can be shirtless, then women should be able to go out in whatever they want, too. She is not asking for anything other than to be comfortable. Men do not sacrifice their comfort in clothing, so neither should we. In times like this, I don’t typically wear a bra, and so many people feel the need to share their opinion with me. I am not looking for attention or for someone to comment on my chest. I just want to feel comfortable in the sun, and if someone has a problem with it, they can avert their eyes. Put yourself and your health first, then forget the rest. It’s easier said than done, but the more you practice, the better you’ll get at it.
There are plenty of conversations to listen to or read about on our Substack page, from our Summer Body Expectations blog to our radio show episode. Many of our guests have also talked about their own experiences in dealing with uncomfortability in their own bodies, no matter the season. Remember that you deserve to feel beautiful because you are. You are worthy of taking up space, and you get to choose.
Ways To Engage: Listen to some of our past episodes involving body expectations, the radio show, and/or read the blog, taking notes of what you feel is valuable for you. Put these lessons into practice. Tell yourself in the mirror that you and your body are beautiful every day, even when you don’t feel like it.
Join Melissa LIVE on our Substack (https://substack.com/@thefeelpodcast) for this week's Empowerment Tuesday conversation at 8 am PST/11 am EST. You can also catch it later in the day on your favorite podcast platforms.
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✨ Ready for deeper support? Visit our website to schedule a complimentary 30 minute session to start to learn more about Healthy Summer Body Expectations with Melissa.