Episode 7 - Unapologetic Suburban Troublemaker with Ellen Smith

By Jessica Garrison

There’s so much to unpack with our episodes this week, starting with our guest Ellen Smith. She is a quirky and empathetic boss bitch who is not afraid to tackle hard conversations, which makes her the perfect guest for this podcast. Ellen stands up for the underdog and is continually fighting against racism and antisemitism.

I took a lot from this conversation about boundaries, specifically when Ellen talked about having a hard stop at 5 PM for her work. After everything was shut down in 2020, we got used to having work with us 24/7 on our phones and computers. There wasn’t a clear line of where work stopped and your personal life began. Ellen has since taken that time to name a certain time to stop, no exceptions. It’s a great idea to tell yourself exactly what time you are clocking into work and what time you are clocking out. This not only sets a boundary for those you work with, but for yourself as well so you’re not constantly stressing or checking your emails. If you continue to work from home or have a connection to work out of the physical space, this is advice you might want to take.

Ellen had to take these boundaries into account as well when she was writing her book, Memoirs of a Suburban Troublemaker. Ellen was able to write and publish a story that was her own, rather than writing other people’s stories, and she sees this as an opportunity to create spaces and inspiration for other women to share their stories, too. She recalls how she took care of herself while writing her book because it was going through her history, and sometimes dark things can come up when digging around. She added a touch of humor to some of the darker stories, while still being honest with herself about what it means to her and to the book. She was able to reframe her mindset—instead of thinking this happened to me, she thinks this happened for me. You need to have the lows to have the highs, but it’s key to remember your mental health in these situations as well. Use your knowledge of boundaries and the knowledge of your own body to explore your layers and to rest when needed.

In the episode, Melissa reads an excerpt from Ellen’s book and it truly is a triumph. It’s inspiring to hear Ellen’s story in the form of written word, and we’ve already discussed the importance of memoir in our Herstory feature episode. Her strong sense of justice and her growth is weaved in throughout the book. Ellen’s story is one that can be told for years to come and there would still be new lessons to learn from it. Her book was able to come to fruition because of the boundaries Ellen set for herself, and that success can follow you, too.

Ways to Engage: Think about the perceptions you have about different communities in your area or that you’ve come across in your life. Are these perceptions based on behavior you’ve experienced or stereotypes you’ve been told? Make sure the opinions you’re forming are your own and are fair.